May 1st:
Battle for Terra –
First up for the month is what will be a terrible, horrible animated film, which also appears to rip-off the plot for James Cameron’s upcoming film Avatar. Battle for Terra concerns the humans leaving earth after it is destroyed and setting out for Terra, where humanoid fish things live in peace and harmony (puh-leeze, every intelligent organism fights). Not only does it rip-off Avatar, it also has terrible visuals, on par with George Lucas’ Clone Wars film that came out last August (that was worse because the characters all had polygonal faces). Finally, this movie is in 3D, and only because the producers know that no one is going to see it when it comes, so they can squeeze as much out of the unfortunate souls who go as they can. I likes the 3D and all, but only when it is reserved as a special event, and only when it is in IMAX theaters. Otherwise, I’ll dodge it and view it in its regular 3D format.
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past –
I love trailers like these because basically I get to see the whole movie for free and condensed into 2½ minutes. Sweet. Basically, McConaughey leads a successful and has probably had upwards of 500 girlfriends, ranging from a couple months to 48 seconds. Jennifer Garner plays the one true love, the girl that got away, and the movie applies A Christmas Carol’s structure to teach McConaughey about his sins, and he wins Garner over. It’s a movie that will hold no surprises, be dull, and will get bucks from the females that are attracted to this sort of syrupy crap. Nothing wrong with a rom-com, but you can use the formula in a fresh way, and this ain’t it.
X-Men Origins: Wolverine –
I remember hearing about this project being announced right after X-Men: The Last Stand was released, and hearing it would come out in 2007. Well, it’s 2009, and here we are with the prequel to the X-Men movies (I seem to remember one being slated for Magneto too, which has a 2011 release date). The X-Men Origins is a good idea, I guess, since the X-Men are such vast array of colorful characters with different paths (Lost, anyone?). Since this movie was leaked almost a month ago, I’m wondering if anyone’s going to show up to see this one. My guess is the Internet leak will impact the box office, though the copy was unfinished so people that liked the film may go to see it in it’s finished form. I am indifferent to the whole thing, though, and might see it out of mere curiosity. I’ve heard its good, and I’ve heard its bad, but I’ve never really been interested in the movie, so there you have it.
The Limits of Control [limited] –
In my many film viewings I haven’t really watched any Jim Jarmusch films, which I guess is a terrible crime. Broken Flowers is the only of his films I’ve seen, and I found that to be terribly overrated. However, since I haven’t viewed anything else by him, I’ll definitely keep my eye open for this one. It has a great cast (Issach de Bankolé, Bill Murray, Tilda Swinton) and its trailer entices you without telling you anything. So already I’m sold. I’ll probably make a venture out to see this one when it is released, and I’ll make sure I brush up on my Jim Jarmusch viewing.
May 8th:
Star Trek –
Of any movie getting released this month, or for that matter this summer, this is probably the most highly anticipated film we’re going to get. Already the movie has received rave reviews from its press screenings, notably one in Texas that Ain’t It Cool News set-up, tricking the attendees into thinking they were going to see Wrath of Khan. Personally, Star Trek really isn’t my thing; my dad has watched all the TV shows, and I have seen a fair share of Star Trek: TNG and Voyager. I’ve also seen all the NG movies, and one of the original ones (Undiscovered Country, I think). So I stand in no official capacity to be excited for this movie. The casting seems odd, but then we have been surprised in the past from “bad” casting (everyone scoffed at Heath Ledger when he was cast as the Joker), so really nothing can be said until the movie is out there in theaters. Do we really need a Star Trek reboot? I think not, but if this movie does actually live up the early hype it is generating, then dammit all I’ll eat my words off a sliver platter. I’m not saying the movie will be bad, I’m just not particularly excited for it.
Next Day Air –
Well, this movie looks insane, and not in a good way. Basically stars the guy who plays Turk on Scrubs as a package delivery who mistakenly drops off a shipment of drugs (he does not know it is drugs) to the wrong apartment number, and chaos ensues as the people who were supposed to get it start shooting, and the people who got it start dealing and using. I’m not particularly interested in this movie and, unless this receives the highest possible order of rave reviews (which is the case with every film) I will avoid it. I’m sure it will be a fun time, but you can’t really root for characters that are idiots.
Rudo y Cursi [limited] –
Gael Garcia Bernal and Diego Luna star as the title characters (I’m not sure if that’s respectfully) in this offbeat but funny-enough looking film about two friends or brothers or whatever who are scouted out for football talents, make it big, and then have a downfall (the impression I get from the trailer, at least). Hispanic directors gave us three films in 2006 that all were unique in some way (Children of Men, Babel, and Pan’s Labyrinth) so keep your eyes on Hispanic cinema. They come up with some good shit, though I won’t be seeing this first thing when it hits theaters. Still, looks relatively simple, charming, and fun, so I may just go to escape the hot sun one day.
May 15th:
Angels & Demons –
The prequel to DaVinci Code is being released, starring Tom Hanks again in the role of Robert Langdon. I’ve been told that this is the most cinematic book, or easiest to film book of the series, so I guess that holds promise for the movie. While the first one dealt with Jesus’ ancestry and his tomb, this one deals (I think) with the origin of life. This movie has already caused controversy as Ron Howard was not allowed to film at the Vatican, since the church despises Dan Brown and likewise. This could be a brisk, entertaining thriller, but I won’t prioritize it since there will be other things to see. Still, if I’m bored it could be worth a visit.
The Brothers Bloom [limited] –
I previewed this film back in December when it was originally supposed to be released. Now it has been moved to a May release, and the first seven minutes were released on Hulu. The beginning of the film enticed me, more so then the trailer, and if you enjoyed the heightened sense of reality Rian Johnson created in Brick, then you are definitely shoe horned for this movie. Adrian Brody and Mark Ruffalo play con brothers who decide that they are going to con Rachel Weisz (a rich recluse) out of $2.5 million. Rinko Kikuchi (the deaf chick from Babel) and Robbie Coltrane co-star in what should be a popcorn-munching piece of delightful entertainment.
Management –
Basically Steve Zahn tries to win Jennifer Aniston’s heart over, even though she’s dating Woody Harrelson (who is always awesome). The trailer opens with Aniston letting Zahn touch her butt, which leads him on a quest for her, so the set-up is already a little disturbing. I really don’t think this movie will do it, and will not have high expectations for it when it comes out. To avoid, for sure.
O’ Horten [5/14 – LA/NY] –
Well, the trailer makes no sense: the plot summary, though, is of a man’s retirement, and how that evening plays out. Now that sounds more interesting then what’s presented in the trailer, which just shows a bunch of people running around and stuff. So now my interest has peaked a bit, and when this rolls around I may venture to the U District to view this one. Though it probably won’t reach me until June.
May 22nd:
Terminator Salvation [5/21] –
The era of Schwarzenegger Terminators has passed, and now we focus strictly on John Connor (Christian Bale). I still have to see T3 before I run out to see this, and I only have a couple weeks so I better jump on it. Now, this movie has every reason to be good, save one aspect: director McG. This guy has a great visual style, which is always useful in the medium of music videos (where he started) but I’ve seen Charlie’s Angels and his storytelling abilities were not very evident in that film. This Terminator looks very gritty, though, which is a plus, and with Christian Bale, Bryce Dallas Howard, and Sam Worthington making up the cast, it makes up for the director. However, this could very easily become a huge misfire, but my fingers are crossed that it will deliver and McG will finally make a decent or, hopefully, excellent piece of film. This also receives the rare Thursday release treatment, so you can catch it a day early before you run off on Memorial Day weekend vacations.
Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian –
Since it’s Memorial Day weekend, we’ll get a helping from almost every genre. Terminator fits the action for male adults bill, so here’s Night at the Museum 2, to fit the family bill. I never saw the first film, though I wanted to; it looked like it had a certain sweet charm to it. However, this sequel just looks loud and noisy, adding more historical figures to the group, including General Custer (Bill Hader) and Amelia Earhart (Amy Adams). This is the first of two movies this year to feature Earhart, though the other will be a biopic and not a family romp. Jonah Hill is also in this, so this is a sure sign that the Frat Pack is seeing it’s way out the door and the Apatow crew is really taking over all (are they part of the Frat Pack too?). Still, I won’t see this, mainly from a lack of interest and because I never saw the first one.
Dance Flick –
The trailer I downloaded off of Apple for this originally had it slated for a February release date, so for some reason this got pushed to May to fill the comedy bill on Memorial Day weekend. The Wayans Brothers were originally responsible for Scary Movie, and a sequel or two (I think) but they have not been involved in the atrociously awful Date/Epic/Disaster/Whatever Movies. That’s Friedberg or whatever (and I swear to God, if that idiot releases another movie, I will lead a group of pitchfork and torch wielding protesters and burn down his studio). Flick replaces Movie so you disassociate it from those other ones, but it will be just as bad, I promise you. The only witty moment of the trailer was the “no I in team, or group, or gang, or ensemble” joke. Otherwise, predictable, stupid humor. Over and out.
Easy Virtue [limited] –
For the older generation that doesn’t want noisy terminators, museum pieces, or dancers, here’s an adaptation of a Noel Coward play starring Jessica Biel as an American who shakes things up at a British mansion. She shows off her promiscuity and causes scandal and uproar overseas. Colin Firth and Kristin Scott Thomas also star. Really, what this movie could do is prove Jessica Biel, once and for all, can or cannot act. Really, I am not particularly fascinated by Noel Coward because what I have seen (one, actually, Private Lives) was fun, but not really very conclusive in any way. So I probably won’t go out and see this one because it will only be available in limited markets, and it doesn’t look like the effort will be necessary.
The Girlfriend Experience [LA/NY] –
And finally, art house fans who live in LA or NY will get Steven Soderbergh’s new movie, the Girlfriend Experience, which centers around a call girl (porn star Sasha Grey) and the challenges of her clients and boyfriend leading up to the 2008 presidential election. It’s funny that a porn star has crossed over into the mainstream cinema, since her IMDb page is filled with over 150 porn titles. However, a call girl won’t be much of a stretch for a porn star, and anyways this movie should garner more interest from its director then its star (though it won’t). So unless this gets rave reviews, I won’t see it.
May 29th:
Up –
Pixar’s newest offering is a charming tale of an old man who flies his house up into the skies to go on the adventure of a lifetime, and the young Boy Scout who accidentally attends. Pixar’s advertising department is masterful at telling you just enough about the movie that you want to see it, but nothing else so that when you do finally view it, there are tons of fun surprises waiting. I’m always down for anything Pixar has to offer, though the fact that Pete Doctor directs this leads me to believe it won’t be as excellent as their recent efforts (Doctor directed Monsters, Inc. which I like, but don’t love). Still, should be a really good movie.
Drag Me to Hell –
Sam Raimi finally returns to the Horror genre, a place where has produced one of the most frightening horror movies I’ve ever seen (Evil Dead). Drag Me to Hell really doesn’t have much of a premise: insurance lady who wants a promotion denies a gypsy an extension on whatever or whatever, and so the gypsy curses her (more because she shames the gypsy then makes her homeless). The one thing this will teach you is never to deny a crazy gypsy an extension on her mortgage. I’m not a big horror guy, anyway, so I probably won’t go see this, but it’s nice to see Raimi back in the horror genre after he screwed up Spider-Man 3.
Departures [limited] –
The movie that came out of nowhere and won Best Foreign Language Film at the past Oscar Ceremony better be nothing short of amazing, which means better then The Class. Waltz with Bashir has faded in my memory and the Class has stuck out as a stronger film, so I think Departures robbed the Class. Basically, a musician loses his job and takes on the duty of preparing dead bodies for burial. Kind of a Six Feet Under premise going there, and it has the potential to actually be amazing, but I’m inevitably going to enter this with the same bias I did when I went to see the Reader (and for the record, I never really thought that movie was going to be great). So I will see this, just because it won Best Foreign Film, but my expectations are really, really high. It’s like I want it to fail, but actually, I would be happier if it amazed me, because I always want films to be good (except the Reader, because that movie will always suck).
Coming in June:
Land of the Lost
The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3
Year One
Transformer: Revenge of the Fallen
No comments:
Post a Comment