SNL Digital Shorts

SNL has had a long, rocky history. I most commonly hear people decry the show for not being as funny as it once was, which is true. Tune into any SNL episode these days and most of the sketches are cringe worthy, and rarely, if ever, sport a laugh. But, SNL is churning out some of its best, most memorable moments with the Digital Shorts section.

Back in 2005, Andy Samberg joined the cast of SNL, though he was mainly relegated to the taped segments, such as commercials, and rarely appeared in the live segments. But then, in December of 2005, he produced a music video, dubbed a digital short, with Chris Parnell, dubbed "Lazy Sunday." This sketch was the funniest thing to come out of SNL in a long, long, long time and gave birth to the Digital Short sketches, which are by far the funniest thing to be featured on SNL in a long time. Samberg is part of the comedy group Lonely Island, whose other members are Akiva Schaffer and Jorma Taccone, and they are responsible for the sketches and songs.

Now, after five seasons, they have produced more then 60 digital shorts, though most of them are very bizarre and some not funny, as is the case with SNL (you can't produce genius every week). But I thought I'd rank the top 10 funniest and best videos they've ever put out in the past 5 season run.

10. On the Ground (3502)

Samberg stars as a beatnik who sings about rejecting the system and throwing everything given to him on the ground, be it a free energy drink sample or cake at a birthday party. The video gets a lot of mileage out of the punch line "I threw it on the ground," accompanied by super slo-mo shots of said items hitting the ground. The end of the video has Elijah Wood and Ryan Reynolds, as themselves, tasering Samberg in the butthole after he interrupts their dinner. It's a bit of a lackluster ending, but Samberg's satire on those who oppose the system is still pretty damn funny.

9. Natalie Raps (3113)

The second significant video put out by the Digital Shorts features Chris Parnell interviewing Natalie Portman, who proceeds to rap about her life as being a "badass bitch," contrary to the sweet public image and 4.0 average at Harvard she had. It's a foul mouthed video that is pretty hilarious, followed by Andy dressed as Flavor Flav completing the rap. Samberg is the best in this video, though, as the pompous news reporter who continues to smile and ask questions no matter how vulgar Natalie gets.

8. Laser Cats 4-Ever (3415)

Laser Cats started in the show's 31st season, with Bill Hader and Andy Samberg eagerly presenting SNL Executive Producer Lorne Michaels with a short film they've made to air on the show, Laser Cats. Every year brings a new incarnation of Laser Cats, as Samberg and Hader bug Michaels in various environments, even interrupting a dinner he is having with Senator Dodd. I love the low budget quality because it reminds me of filming movies when I was a kid that turned out exactly like that. This particularly Laser Cats features Steve Martin pitching the Laser Cats idea to an increasingly exasperated Michaels. The plot of each one centers around cats that shoot lasers from their eyes or mouth or something, and Hader and Samberg's quest to stop an evil something-or-other from winning. Watching all five is a treat, and I look forward to further installations in the Laser Cat franchise.

7. Dick in a Box (3209)

This song, a collaboration with Justin Timberlake, is what really launched the Digital Shorts in stardom. It received a creative arts Emmy and became a hit all over the Internet. It's premise involves Samberg and Timberlake as two sleazy guys who decide the best gift for their girlfriends at Christmas is their Dick in a Box. The payoff is at the end, when Samberg and Timberlake dance around with Christmas Boxes hanging to them by their junk. It's wonderfully inappropriate humor that called for the return of these two characters in a far superior video.

6. The Japanese Office (3312)

The video opens with Ricky Gervais more or less commenting on how unoriginal the American Office is because, well, it's copied from his show. But then he reveals that his inspiration came from a Japanese version of the show, and we are treated to the exact same pilot episode as the UK and US Offices, just in Japanese. If you've seen either version of the Office, then this video is a non-stop riot, and if not, then the joke is probably lost on you. Steve Carrell, who has hosting the show, reprises his role of Michael Scott, but in Japanese. Finally, the show ends, and it's finished off with the best line in the whole thing: Ricky Gervais laughing and saying, "It's funny because it's racist."

5. Lazy Sunday (3109)

This is where it all began. A simple music video about two dudes rapping about their quest to go see The Chronicles of Narnia was the funniest thing SNL had put out in a long, long time. Not much more can be said about this video. You know it well enough by now, probably, and it gave birth to a whole new segment in the SNL series. The lyrics are fast and creative (Mr. Pibb and Red Vines equals crazy delicious), and what really sells it is the intensity of the performance by the two. Every time I watch it it never ceases to make me laugh.

4. Great Day (3522)

This was the most recent Digital Short, aired at the season finale, and it also has endless replay value. Samberg plays Dennis, a man who snorts coke and then proceeds to sing about how great his day is going to be in the style of a Disney number. He gets increasingly agitated and the song speeds up as he snorts more coke, eventually ending in a great gag where he and his fellow dancers imitate the Matrix. Also a hilarious punch line is when Samberg's face becomes distorted and his eyes turn red.

3. Jizz in My Pants (3410)

This far and away the most successful video they have done, receiving the most YouTube hits and being instantly catchy. It also features Jorma Taccone, one of Samberg's fellow Lonely Islanders, as they sing about premature ejaculation at the slightest thing (from a woman's touch to her voice to the ending of the Sixth Sense). Jamie Lynn-Sigler, who plays Meadow on the Sopranos, guest stars, as does Justin Timberlake and Akiva Schaffer. Basically, you know this song pretty well by now.

2. Motherlover (3422)

Season 34 was a terrific run for the Digital Shorts, from Jizz in My Pants, to the number 1 pick, to this sequel to Dick in a Box. Samberg and Timberlake reprise their roles as the sleazy dudes just getting released from jail for the mishaps of the first video. They realize it's mother's day and they didn't get their mom's anything. And, true to their nature, they decide they should swap moms and give them "company." The moms are played by Patricia Clarkson and Susan Sarandon, and the video is so wrong it is just hilarious. That's all I can say. I don't see how Samberg and Timberlake can top this one, because it is one of the best they have put out.

1. I'm on a Boat (3416)

The other significant piece from Season 34, this is by far and away just the best thing they've ever done. Every time I view the video, and insane energy courses through my body and as soon as the video ends, I want to watch it all over again. The song also holds up on its own and is just a great number to belt out to. The lyrics are fast and creative (I've got my swim trunks, and my flippy-floppys, I'm flipping burgers you at Kinko's straight flippin' copies), and the beginning of the video is funny as hell. The Lonely Island is eating breakfast when Samberg wins a boat ride from three and selects Akiva and T-Pain, who happens to be there as well, to accompany him. This will having you belting "I'm on a Boat" long after it's over.

The Worst of the 2000s

I realized today that I never really reflected on which movies were the worst of the decade that expired nearly 8 months ago. We all got obsessed figuring what was the best, what would live on in memory, and we forgot to reflect on the amount of shit that came out in the decade as well. Now I didn't see a lot of movies that I thought were horrible. There are a fair number of bad movies I missed (Battlefield Earth and Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever are two notable ones I never saw), so if you think there are movies worse then what I've listed, there probably are. I don't make it a habit to runaround and see all the awful movies out there so I can make a good worst of the decade list. There are also only 5 movies, because I don't think the worst should be dignified with slots (and it's more fun to figure out what really is the worst).

5. Troy (2004)

Dir. Wolfgang Petersen

This took a story I loved, the Trojan War (I haven't read the Iliad itself), and got everything about it wrong. Eric Bana, Diane Kruger, and Peter O'Toole (especially O'Toole) are the only good parts of the movie, and while I don't hate the rest of the cast, I think they were either miscast or their roles were underwritten. Brian Cox is Agamemnon, and he is good in the role, but the role is typified as a villain. Similarly, Achilles (Brad Pitt) seems like nothing more then a surfer dude who also happens to be a badass with a sword. And Sean Bean was about one of the worst choices for Odysseus. I should trust the guy, not suspect his every motive.

Even worse is how the movie tries and fails to be like Lord of the Rings, with battles as epic as any in that film, but with none of the emotional heft. Really, I find it hard to believe the whole nation of Greece would ride out against Troy without some motivation...which is where the Gods came in! Now, true, the inclusion of Gods can be ridiculous, but I think this is what the story needed. Most of what happens in these Greek stories is because the Gods are bored and trying to spite each other. The movie also takes a 10-year war and condenses it down into two weeks or so, the fastest war I've ever heard of.

This is also when Orlando Bloom had a brief run of popularity (but who remembers him now?), and he is probably the worst as Paris. I hated everything about this movie, except Peter O'Toole who can never be hated. I hope one day to see a movie that does the Trojan War justice.

4. Rush Hour 2 (2001)

Dir. Brett Ratner

The only time I saw this movie was when I was 12 or 13-years-old, and I remember even then thinking how horrible the script was. The jokes aren't funny, the story is all over the place, and Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan have zero chemistry (plus, Tucker is REALLY annoying). While anything with Chan will have fun fight sequences, this still can't escape the fact that it's a Brett Ratner film, who really is one of the worst filmmakers out there today. I don't remember much about the movie, but I was very unhappy with my friend who recommended it to me.

3. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009)

Dir. Michael Bay

I continually name this as one of the worst because I was fool enough to go to the midnight screening and witness the heinous acts against humanity on the screen. The script is horrible, built around action sequences Bay devised while the writers were on strike, and the story doesn't make any sense. If the Fallen can only be destroyed by a Prime, then doesn't that make Megatron stronger then he, since he does succeed in killing Optimus Prime? The movie is also horribly racist, with two jive-talking robots that are the comic relief but also African-Americanish. They also can't read the language of the robots. Yeah. Just stay away from this pile of trash.

2. Kung Pow: Enter the Fist (2002)

Dir. Steve Oedekerk

It's a spoof of the martial arts genre, and its about the most annoying thing I have ever seen. Oedekerk casts himself in the title roll, as a baby whose parents are killed by a thug and who grows up seeking vengeance for his dead parents. The movie uses an actual Kung Fu film, The Savage Killers, and while the movie gets a laugh out of dubbing, it gets several groans out of a love interest who makes an annoying sound, and a cow who knows Kung Fu. It's not a funny movie, it is a horrible one.

1. Napoleon Dynamite (2004)

Dir. Jared Hess

Comedy is the hardest genre: rarely do they get recognized for how funny and touching they can be, but the bad ones stand out worse then a bad drama. A bad drama you forget, but a bad comedy...you remember it because you can't figure out why it was funny. And I can't figure out why the world fell in love with this quirky story of a weirdo from Idaho who does...nothing! This movie is about nothing! Just this guy who is awkward and lives his life!

I guess it would help if I actually thought the guy was funny. And while I think Jon Heder is good, I don't think the character is that...interesting. He's just annoying. The audience laughs at Napoleon, not with him. Not once are we given an insight into this character, who he is, what his dreams are. We simply get random gags. His grandma is injured in a dune buggy accident. Ok, not really that funny. His uncle thinks he was once a great NFL star and goes wild in front of the TV. And his brother chats with women online all day long.

Really, I didn't like anything about this movie. I remember when it came out, and how much everyone loved it. I saw it because they said see it. But this movie is the worst because I don't think there is any other movie that has received as much public acclaim as this that I just can't...stand. It's a bad movie, and definitely one I have hated since the moment I saw it.

Inception (2010)

It's hard to really give a thorough description of what Inception is about, but here's the most basic ingredient to understanding how complex it is: Imagine the Matrix. Now imagine that there was a Matrix inside that Matrix. And possibly another one inside that one. You kind of get the head trip that Inception is about to take you on.

The movie concerns that which is most precious to movies: dreams. Movies realize our greatest dreams and greatest fantasies, and Inception is a movie to challenge all those notions. Here is the reason we go to the cinema: to see things we've never seen before, to experience thrills that we've never dreamed of. A Trip to the Moon was a modern marvel in 1902, and I'm happy to report that in a summer full of sequels, reboots, and whatever else, Christopher Nolan has delivered what could very well turn out to be his best movie.

I say could because I'm not sure of the movie's greatness yet. But it is a movie that, once over, immediately warrants a repeat viewing because you want to go back, knowing what you now know, and reconstruct the movie from there. Repeat viewings, as is true for all movies, test whether something is truly a masterpiece. For now, I will say Inception is one of the best of the year and maybe that opinion will change later on.

The movie is about a specialized group of people who steal ideas from other people's dreams. Leonardo DiCaprio plays Cobb, one of the best in this field, along with Joseph Gordon-Levitt. I won't even begin trying to explain how this process, known as "extraction," exactly works, and I won't even delve too far into the concept of Inception except to say, it is the opposite of an extraction.

Marion Cotillard is also in this movie, as Leo's wife, and she has a stare that terrifies the shit out of you. There's also Ellen Page, who doesn't know how this stuff works and so serves as our entry point into the whole idea of the dream world. Her job is to construct the reality of the dream so that the subject doesn't realize there are other "dreamers" there.

Nolan, who is the sole writing credit on this one (usually his brother Jonathan collaborates, but this one was maybe to intricate for Nolan to lay out for him on paper), proves how adept he is at juggling multiple story lines. This movie is the perfect study of parallel editing over the course of an hour to build tension so high that you are about to burst at the seams with craziness just wanting it to all end.

Undoubtedly there will be several knockoffs of this film down the line, but we will weather them. People will try to be as brilliant as Nolan, but few if any will succeed. He is working on a whole new level, way ahead of the rest of his competition, and inventing the curve. Did I understand Inception? Yes. Can I explain it? Yes, but it would take far too much time to lay out, and honestly, you should just go see it. It's a movie that has to be experienced, it cannot simply be explained.